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Thursday, December 01, 2005

Germophobia Part Deux

So don't catch the irony when it flies by...the germophobe episode of Seinfeld was on this evening, making it a three day discussion of my germophobia.

Last night part of my wild rampant thought process was the amount of television I watch. When I was in Belize I was stunned by how slow the days went by, and how much I was able to accomplish in the time that I was awake...even going to bed earlier than normal. The answer I came up iwth was television.

Indulge me, oh lovelies, and I will tell you a tale of addiction.

My television schedule is as follows. Keep in mind, this is a combination of my DVR, bastard son of TiVo, and the programs I watch live.

Monday:
Dr Phil (1 hour), The Tyra Banks Show (1 hour), Seinfeld (2 hours), The Division (1 hour), Murphy Brown (30 min) = 5.5 hours

Tuesday:
Dr Phil (1 hour), The Tyra Banks Show (1 hour), Seinfeld (2 hours), The Office (30 min), The Division (1 hour), Murphy Brown (30 min) = 6 hours

Wednesday:
Dr Phil (1 hour), The Tyra Banks Show (1 hour), Seinfeld (2 hours), America's Next Top Model (1 hour), The Division (1 hour), Murphy Brown (30 min) = 6.5 hours

Thursday:
Dr Phil (1 hour), The Tyra Banks Show (1 hour), Seinfeld (2 hours), Survivor (1 hour), CSI (1 hour), The Division (1 hour), Murphy Brown (30 min) = 7.5 hours

Friday:
Dr Phil (1 hour), The Tyra Banks Show (1 hour), Seinfeld (2 hours), Supernanny (1 hour), CSI (2 hours) Murphy Brown (30 min) = 7.5 hours

Then there's Saturday and Sunday, which I won't include just to prove my point. Then you can take out the commercials, if you want, and also assume that the Seinfeld is a bonus, and that 1-2 days a week I don't watch it. But, assuming I have a perfect week, Monday through Friday I watch 33 hours of television. That's almost a full time job. Good God. Think of all the things I could do with an extra 33 hours a week. Hell, with an extra 15 hours a week--half that time!

My compulsion for television goes back a long way, though, back to the days of latchkey kiddom when I was home alone without any friends except for Dennis the Menace and Garfield every afternoon.

I'm a sick, sick person.

1 comment:

Nance Knauer said...

hmmm. while you watch, do you do other things? is it often on as a background? and if you're sick, me thinks you have plenty of company...