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Tuesday, December 22, 2009

Funeral the Fourth

I went to my fourth funeral in four months tonight. Well...visitation, actually--but I sort of count them as the same thing. I actually think the wake is more important--sort of like the wedding reception being more important than the actual ceremony.

I haven't had that funeral to month ratio since my Montgomery days, and I forget sometimes how exhausting death is. This is something I need to think about as I embark on a career in mortuary science. I am still doing that, by the way! Death screws with my sleep, with my eating, with my everything. I've talked about it before, but it's how I deal with it--it's not something that is likely to change. So, when I think about making my career in the death industry, surrounding myself with grief and death and dying, I have to wonder--will I make it? Will I desensitize myself or find coping strategies that enable me to sleep at night? Or, will I NOT make it--simply drop from sheer exhaustion at some random funeral because I ignore my own physical reactions.

It's an interesting question.

Grandma, Mark, Pete, and Marissa. 93, 54, 19, 20. Grandmother, Husband, Son, Daughter.

Exhausting.

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